Who would have ever believe this would go on so long!!

The 2nd Steriod shot was short lived. I continued to live everyday in debilitating pain. Today I met with a surgeon. I will have surgery a week from tomorrow. He will clean out L4-L5 and FINALLY free the sciatic nerve and give me pain relief!! I am at peace with this. I know I can not live life the way I am now. I told the doctor "I have to get back to work!!"" and "I want my life back!" Please continue to pray for me. My journey is changing me, challenging me and making me assess what I thought was important. I have awakend to the realization of how much I took for granted. I know we don't find God in the good times. Sometimes we don't find God at night when you cry out to Him to help you. But I know God is helping me when he sents good faithfilled people to encourage and pray with me. I could see the Hand of God when the doctor walked into the room and said, "Hey I know you! YOU were the nurse when our last baby was born." God had a hand in this years before. He is the past , present and future. Okay God, I'm ready to move on with my life. Lets celebrate Christmas. The time of faith and hope. and than a few days later I will submit to faith and hope in spinal surgery! Let it happen!! I am ready !!

Today Dec. 12 finds me still controlled my the nerve pain in my leg. Mr Pain has been weakened by my first steroid shot, but has not been conquered. It been almost two weeks since my injection. I would say I am about 50% better than what I was. Now I can walk almost upright. I can get in and out or the bed with less pain (still the hardest thing I do).  But I am not able to walk very far, not able to take a step without searing pain in the back of my thigh and hip. Although the pain is a 7 now instead of a 10 I am still a prisoner. The best thing is I am able to get in my car with a step stole and drive!!!
I went to the Pain and Spine Doctor today and I will be getting a second injection on Wednesday. He's hope is if I got a 50% improvement with the first injection I'll see another 50% with this one. All I know if this injection does not give me what I need, I am ready for surgery!!
I began my pain on Oct. 31.The three weeks before my bowel surgery was the worst. (I still believe that the two things; bowel being strangled by scar tissue and back are connected. But no one seems to be interested in connecting the two). All I know is I'm exhausted of the pain and limitations it has put on my life.
I will have the 2nd injection Wednesday at 3:45. Today I cried when I told the doctor I am ready for this pain to be over. I NEED to get back to work. Its so scary when you have no control over your body.
 I wonder why this has happened to me. Is it a test from God? When I think about this I think about this the same thing runs through my head. "When I pray for God to heal me, I want him to heal some suffering child at Childrens. Don't waste you time on me when there are many more people who need a miracle." I feel selfish when I ask God for time. I can make it through without His attention. I ask for His attention to be on someone more needy.  Please pray that God will triage His the prayers and give to the most needy. Please pray in this way.
I hate to complain about my situation. But than again I want my friends and family to be with me! I can't face it alone.
Thank you for your wonderful words, I read and reread me many time. I hope my tomorrows will include many fun time, (WITHOUT MR. PAIN thank you).
All my love Linda